Sorrow

Thank you for your prayers.  Paxten's healing is now complete and she is safe in the arms of Jesus. 

Please don't stop praying.  Blake and Libby need our support in such a huge way still.  I can not even fathom driving the three hour drive home without my baby.  Knowing I'd never see her again.  This battle has been so long and so draining.  They are weary and beaten and lost as to what to do next.  My heart hurts so much.  I don't know how to be a friend to someone who has lost a baby.  I'm terrified that I'll do or say the wrong thing.  I think of what a hurt our family will be.  A constant reminder of what they had and don't now. 

I've said before.  Paxten has changed me.  But I know I'm not alone. For the last few weeks everytime I get on facebook 99% of my feed is about Pax.  Where ever I go people are asking.  Pictures of people P4P have poured in.  Our community has rallied together with fundraisers and memorials.  Paxten was here for a purpose and God counted her days out until that purpose was finished.  I'm so grateful for her gift but I hurt so bad for dear friends who were asked to be the parents of that gift.  What a huge responsibility that they handled with nothing but grace and steadfast faith, even when admitting the struggles to understand. 

As I sat down with two little 4 year olds full of questions about Pax and their concerns (are there toys in heaven?) and their confusion (mommy, can't we call her on the phone in heaven?) I was blessed by their assessment of the situation.  "Mommy we don't have to cry.  Paxten's not sick!"  So true.  And I do celebrate in her new glorified body.  But I'm sad for us here and that will carry for a long time. 

Thank you for your prayers, for your faithfulness to the Pearsons and for not letting what we've learned from Paxten fade.