The Wait

So it has been a while since I've updated on our adoption process. Not because I haven't wanted to. Believe me, I could talk about it a LOT if you let me. : ) There really just isn't much new to say. Our dossier was sent in just before Christmas and while that came with lots of excitement (i.e. this) it was soon followed up by a bit of a let-down. While the paperwork and expenses were extensive and stressful at least I felt like I was doing SOMETHING to help bring our son home. At the moment we are just waiting. Waiting. Waiting. I hate that it's out of my hands now. What I wake up each day hoping to get is our referral. This will be a name, a picture and background information on what could be our future son. We  will have the opportunity to review the information, pray about the decision and then say yes or no to the little boy on our screen. I know I should never say never (right, Justin Bieber?) but I can't imagine very many scenarios where we would say no but that's the process anyway.

Here's what the dictionary has to say about waiting (I can tell you were wondering)

·         to be available or in readiness

·         to look forward to eagerly

·         to continue as one is in expectation of

·         to remain inactive or in a state of repose, as until something expected happens

Check, check, check and check. We are WAITING. And I'm not a fan. A friend recently send a kind donation and with it was this necklace that basically sums it all up for me:

The heart is over the spot in Africa that we will be heading....Kinshasa. Oh the longing for that little heart.

I was looking into a t-shirt fundraiser we  were talking about and they had some listed under the theme "Paper Pregnancy". Cute, right? All my fellow adoptive mommies will totally get that. The shirts had clever sayings like:

·         So far no morning sickness but the paper cuts are terrible!

·         Motherhood: No stretch marks required

·         Fatherhood: Requires love, not DNA

I can totally related to these. I've often tried to equate the waiting for this adoption to the waiting during a pregnancy but there are some flaws in that theory. For one, when I've been pregnant I know exactly where my little one is....generally hanging on my right rib cage. I'm secure in the knowledge that the only harm being done at any given moment is that Crispy Creme donut I should have avoided that morning.

A second difference is the timeline. With a pregnancy it's pretty straight-forward, 9 months give or take. We're 8 months into this thing and don't really have any idea how much longer we could be waiting. Another 8 months? Ugh.

Another one is in appearance. While we didn't know exactly what our sweet girls would look like I could take a look at my hunky husband and glance at myself in the mirror and get a pretty good idea what might be popping out. With our son I just have NO IDEA what to imagine. I just want that picture so much! To know in my mind what I know in my heart....he's ours.

Well, I guess I've drilled in the truth about our situation right now. I'm waiting. I don't like it. I'm pouting about it. I've been so blessed by friends and family asking though. I really love that he's on your minds as he is ours. Please keep praying for him (and us). We know that all of this is in God's hands and while my impatient side balks against the unknown I do have great comfort in knowing that each day that goes by is one that God has designed to bring us one day closer to completing our family.

"And He said to them, 'It is not for you to know times or seasons which the Father has put in His own authority'." Acts 1:7

It's in the Mail!!

Today was a big day for us in our adoption process.  Our dossier went into the mail!  If you aren't familiar with international adoption this may be a new term for you.

Here's the technical fancy definition:

Dossier: When used in the context of adoption, this term refers to a set of appropriately authenticated and translated legal documents which are used in international adoption cases to process the adoption of a child in its own country by the adoptive parents, or for the adoptive parents to obtain the legal custody or guardianship of the child in the foreign court, so the child can be brought by the adoptive parents to the United States for adoption.

Here's my layman's simple definition:

Dossier: A heck of a lot of paperwork.....all notarized. 

There's not really a way to show how much paper it was.  But trust me....a lot!  Some of the items in this pile include: homestudy, financial statements, reference letters, doctor's health checks, fingerprint clearances, pictures, copies of passports, marriage licenses, birth certificates, copies of driver's licenses and one very large check!

Whew!  I don't know if you can tell but we were pretty excited....

I had a big smile on my face the entire time I was at the post office.  I imagine she thought I was a tad crazy.  : ) 

So what happens next?  All that paperwork is headed to our adoption agency.  Then, the parts that are needed in the Congo will be translated into French.  Then, they'll be off to the government in the Congo.  Once there, we'll be put on the list to wait for our referral.  A referral will be a picture and information on a waiting child.  We will be able to pray about it and decide of this is our son.

After these last few months of everything depending on me and my progress in the process it feels so good, and somewhat hard to believe, that it is out of my hands for the time being.  Prayer is being called into action in a BIG way now. 

Thank you for your help in getting us this far and we look forward to sharing with you during the next steps of this process!

Coming Up for Air....

Well, in our efforts to do our small part to help children in need I'm afraid we're only contributing to the problem of deforestation.  We are drowning in a sea of paperwork here. 

It's something you always hear about....as in, "Oh, there's a lot of paperwork for adoptions." 

What they really mean is..."Open an account with a paper supplier, buy an industrial printer, be prepared to never see your kitchen table again and invest in a lot of bandaids for those paper cuts." 

I mean, who knew that the name of my mom's second aunt twice removed on my grandfather's side's dog would be information that the government would need to have.  Ok, perhaps now I exaggerate...

But, on the up side, I know that each document finished, each copy made and every name signed brings us one papercut closer to our little man!  Whew! 

P.S. Yes, we have a firesafe.  Do you?  We got it as a wedding gift.  I can still remember what my cousin wrote on the card.  "I know this seems like a strange present but we got one for our wedding and were surprised how handy it was."  She was very right.  We've even paid it forward at other weddings.  It keeps all our important stuff like birth certificates, SS cards, etc.  Certainly nothing exciting or valuable to others but would be a pain to replace after a tragedy.  Do people still use safe deposit boxes?  I loved going there as a kid.  It always seemed so secretive and exciting and mysterious.  I guess this is our safe deposit box now.